Tonight is (again) full moon night.
A big, orange perfect circle illuminating the night sky.
They say this specific full moon is good to let go of the past, of anything that doesn’t suit you anymore nor does any good to you.
So I decided to write up some of the goals I wish for, which imply I let go of old (bad) habits… I’m trying.
I thought wether I should share this or not but then again, I shared so many personal thoughts already, figured these ones wouldn’t hurt either.
Starting with self-confidence. I want to be more self-confident in my core (not my abs… well, those ones to, actually). I seem super confident in my daily life. I seem in control pretty much always (at least to those who don’t know me that well). Well I want to exude self-confidence and trust myself, regardless of third party opinions. I want my own opinion on myself to grow and be stronger.
I want to be optimistic by default. I want to believe in a better future. I want to believe deep down that the best is really yet to come.
I want to distinguish good people who will add value to my life from people who will only drain my energy and eventually take advantage of my insecurities.
I want to be clear minded to be able to make plans… not just dreaming wide awake… I need a plan. And can’t really draw it. Too much noise, thoughts and questions in my mind… too much of everything in my tiny simple brain.
I want to find a purpose… more than being a nice and respecting person to others. I just need to find out what and how (simple no?!).
I want to free myself from any weight or blockage (conscious or unconscious) that’s keeping me from moving forward.
I want to be wiser. More understanding. Calmer.
I want to be able to love my family even at a distance and show them that I care.
I want to be able to accept life as it is. Accept what might never be (this one has been the hardest one).
And finally… I need to forgive myself for all the stupid, silly, uncalled for things/behaviors I can’t control sometimes. They don’t define me. They are however a part of me. And I need to live with it.
I can only do my best to be a better person but I will never, ever, be perfect or close to it.
I wish the Moon, the Universe, God, whatever mysterious force pulling everything together, will listen to my prayers.
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